When we found out that we were expecting our second child, we knew that we wanted to make a very careful choice about where the baby would be born. Our experience of a hospital birth in Southampton for our first son, Hugh, had been mixed and as we were now living in Cheshire, we wanted to look at the various options that were available to us. When Hugh was born, I had been induced. Initially this didn’t work, so I was induced again, but by now it was outside of visiting hours and Mark was asked to leave. This was really upsetting for us both, particularly as we were told that the labour could progress very rapidly when the second induction took effect. I went into labour in the middle of the night and it was only due to the fact that I was by chance in a single room and the midwife on duty was happy to turn a blind eye, that Mark was able to sneak back in to be with me. Hugh finally arrived the next afternoon, and although the two midwives at the delivery were fantastic, we felt the aftercare was very poor. They insisted Hugh and I stayed the night and the hospital environment and very restrictive visiting hours were not a positive start to life together as a family.
We were very keen to avoid a repeat of this, particularly given that we wanted Hugh to be as much a part of things as is practical for a two and a half year old. Our initial visits to the local team of midwives did little to inspire confidence although we were given a lot of information about the possibility of a home birth, which seemed to solve many of initial worries. However, talking to other local mums and finding out more from the hospital, we became increasingly concerned that a planned homebirth would end up being impossible due to staff shortages and perceived complications. Luckily Mark came across Jo’s website and we decided to find out more about what she offered.
 From the moment that we met Jo we knew that we had found a midwife who was professional and knowledgeable, but above all else was happy to listen to our concerns and come up with a birth plan to suit us all. We were keen for Hugh to be a part of my ante-natal care and Jo was wonderful at explaining to him what was happening. He soon started asking when Jo was coming next and couldn’t wait to help press the buttons to take my blood pressure and listen to the baby’s heart beat. Jo was also great at talking to us as a couple - previously Mark had felt very isolated and often his opinion seemed to be ignored by the midwives.
As my due date started to get closer I was getting small contractions for several hours a day over a period of about a week. During this time, Jo visited regularly to give us reassurance that everything was alright and we always felt that we could phone her at any time.
Finally one morning when I woke up, I thought the contractions felt different and I phoned Jo to let her know. She arrived at about 9.30am and confirmed that things were starting to happen. About an hour later I phoned a friend who had offered to look after Hugh, only to find out that she was on her way to the doctors. Jo was very calm and relaxed and suggested that she popped out with Hugh for a short while to keep him entertained and to give Mark and I some time to adjust to the fact that baby was really on its way. The plan was that we would then all have lunch together, by which time Hugh could go to our friends house. As I am a full time Mum, Hugh is rarely away from me, and it was a real testament to how much Jo had become part of our family that he was delighted to be going out with her.
About an hour after they had left, the contractions suddenly got a lot stronger and I felt that I wanted to push. Given how long my labour with Hugh had been, this was a bit of a shock to me. But Mark was great and phoned Jo who came straight back. In between contractions, Mark cooked a huge pile of cheese on toast for Hugh (his favourite) and whilst I was in the living room, Hugh sat quite happily eating in the kitchen. I don’t think he could quite believe his luck that he had been given so much! Jo was wonderfully calm and reassuring and without me really being aware of it, had got all the practical bits and pieces ready for the birth. Mark was able to be with me during the contractions, then would pop into the kitchen to check on Hugh. He explained that the baby was on its way out of my tummy and Hugh simply accepted all that was happening. Mark then brought him in to see me, so he could see I was ok, before taking him upstairs for his usual afternoon nap. With Hugh safely out of the way and Mark back at my side, I felt as comfortable and as happy as is probably possible when you are in labour. Jo was great at just being there; she didn’t interfere and her quiet confidence gave me the strength to believe that I was doing everything I should be.
After about half an hour of pushing, our little baby boy finally arrived. I actually gave birth kneeling on the floor, leaning over the settee - not very dignified but it worked for me. Because of this, I couldn’t immediately see what was happening behind me, but I soon realised that all was not well. Mark was sitting next to me and looking very worried. Jo explained that the cord had been round his neck twice and although she had been able to unloop it once when just his head was out, I had unknowingly pushed him fully out with the second loop still tight round his neck. He wasn’t breathing and looked frighteningly limp and purple. Jo was really calm and worked so quickly that it was only afterwards that I fully realised what had been happening. She was very reassuring that everything was now fine and explained that with the cord still being attached, he was receiving all the oxygen supply that he needed. With his immediate needs taken care of, Jo and Mark helped me up onto the settee where I was able to lay down wrapped up in a duvet and hold our baby for the first time.
He immediately cuddled in and latched on. This was fantastic for me, as Hugh had taken several days before he really got the hang of feeding. Jo and Mark were now able to sit down and relax and again Jo was great at reassuring us that he had not suffered any bad consequences.
Once he had fed and the placenta had been delivered, Hugh woke up and Mark was able to bring him straight down to meet his baby brother who by now was only about half an hour old. It was a really wonderful time for us all to be together and for Hugh to be the first person to meet him and be told his little brother’s name - George.
I spent the next hour or so relaxing on the settee and watching whilst Jo, Mark and Hugh cleaned, weighed and dressed George. Hugh was able to hold him and was fascinated to see how small he looked. We then celebrated by having apple crumble and custard - another favourite of Hugh’s and welcome food for those of us who had missed lunch! By now, we were able to reflect on how different George’s birth had been from Hugh’s. Being in our own home, without the noise and clinical environment of a hospital must have been a better introduction to the world for George and we are sure it was nicer for Hugh to meet him in this way as well. For me, I was able to eat my own food, snuggle under my own duvet and generally do whatever suited us all best.
Jo stayed with us for a couple of hours after George had been born. She was wonderful at leaving us on our own to spend time together as a family, but I always knew she was there in the background. Before she went, she ran me a bath and tidied up everywhere. Mark and I were so grateful to her for all that she had done. We were confident that Jo had been the best possible person to deliver George.
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